Close to Crawling

We're almost there! Arden is up on all fours, and rocking furiously, as she tries to grab an item in front of her. Yesterday, she lunged forward to grab a toy and did one brief "crawling" motion. Before long, she will be very active and crawling everywhere! Then, we will have to remember how to child-proof the house again.

Here are a few pictures that show her progression of normal activity: smile, try to crawl, then eat her clothes. Seriously, she is the only one out of all my three children who is always chewing on her clothing! Maybe it's because girl's tops are looser and are more flowing, so she has an easier time pulling the fabric up to her face. It's really attractive to take her places when she is chewing on her shirt and exposing her belly! Then, she leaves drool stains on her shirt. I'm still trying to figure out how to do her next professional photo session, since she will probably be eating her clothes just 3 minutes into it, and the wet spots will show in the photos! Oh well . . .

Stuart returns home from Arizona today, and he had lots of fun going to the Grand Canyon for the last two days of his trip.

Cash Update

Use it up,

Wear it out,

Make it do,

or do without!

We did it!!

We went a full month without using a credit card or debit card for any of our food, miscellaneous, and general household expenses! Just cold, green CASH.

The great part was getting the credit card bill in the mail the other day. It was so thin, so light. When I opened it up, I was sure that it would scare me. It didn't. For the first time in a long time, the balance was what I expected. It was just gasoline charges. Yea! (Now, I could write a whole other post about how gas prices are so high, that the bill wasn't as low as it should be, even though all that was on it was gas. I mean, don't you remember the days not so long ago when gas was just .99 cents per gallon! . . . )

The reward came when I got done with paying the required bills after Stuart just got paid, and we had almost $700 left this month! Too bad that it all has to go towards the annual property tax bill that is due in early October. But, it's still great progress! After this month, we hope to begin applying that amount each month towards paying off our Odyssey van early.

So . . was it worth it, and will I continue to do the Dave Ramsey-crazy-fanatical-cash only-envelope system thing? Definitely, yes.

Is it hard? Definitely, yes.

I feel like we are scrimping right now. I am checking prices constantly. I compare grocery food products for the best price per ounce. I bought a huge, 5 lb tube of ground beef and split it into freezer portions in order to save price per pound on meat. I am buying all of Arden's clothing second hand with consignment sales and Ebay (I mean down to EVERY pair of her shoes for this fall!). I have noticed that I haven't gone out to "browse" at the stores much because I know I can't buy anything. We haven't paid to eat out as a family a single time. I waited in line for 40 minutes to get the boys' hair cut at a "grand opening" special at a new salon for $2.99 each, in order to save the usual cost of $12.00 per haircut.

It is taking hard work, dedication, denial, and sacrifice. If you see me still wearing shorts and capris into October and November, it's because I don't have enough clothing money budgeted yet to buy jeans that fit post-baby #3! However, it's been fun to challenge ourselves to be better stewards of our money, and we know that it will have a reward of accumulating more savings down the road.

So, I've already spent all but $100 of my food/household cash that is to last for the next two weeks . . . in three days! Yes, Sam's Club and Walmart can consume most of my budget. I've got to make it for 12 more days. I'm determined, and I'm looking around for more things to sell on Ebay!

Wrecks and Resignations

It's been quite a crazy week!

Stuart left last Saturday to go to a conference in Arizona with the intent of "destressing" from various pressures here. He thought that going to a conference and having multiple evenings without kids would be very relaxing. You know . . . watching an entire movie without interruption, doing some Bible study, going sightseeing, no one crying or whining.

Well, less than 48 hours after arriving, Stuart had a car accident . . . in the rental car. So, his well-deserved "get away" turned into hours of phone calls to insurance agents, rental car companies, etc. He made friends with the person he hit, but that doesn't seem to get him out of the ticket that the Tucson policeman gave him. Ugh! Hopefully, we can get all of the details resolved quickly, and then we can get on with regular life . . . albeit with higher car insurance premiums!

Additionally, Stuart's boss Lona McCastlain, the elected prosecutor of Lonoke County, publicly announced her resignation to the press yesterday (http://www.arkansasleader.com/2008/09/top-story-prosecutor-for-lonoke.html). Governor Beebe will appoint a replacement to finish the rest of her term. Basically, that leaves Stuart's job uncertain after December 31 of this year. We are looking for new employment, so please pray for our job situation. We are desiring that God will move us to a place where we can do ministry as well as work in a stable job situation. We would like to live nearby, but we are open to any possibility at this point. We are praying for a job that would meet our family's financial needs, be in a location with good public schools, and also be in a place where there is a great contemporary church which we could get involved in.

We know that God's timing is always perfect . . . it's just hard to wait when the clock is ticking loudly!

Tightening our Belts

Okay . . . this cash thing is hard. I keep telling myself that this month will be the hardest since we had to pay the credit card bill from last month's charges AND come up with enough funds to live on cash for our current expenses. It's almost like having double the expenses for household and food this month, just so we can finally live on cash. Next month has got to get easier!

Here are some things I have done so far that are different from our normal spending habits before cash:

1. I went to Walmart to get groceries, and I honestly didn't know if I would have enough cash in my wallet to pay the bill. I didn't want to bring a calculator and have to add up 182 items manually as I went up and down the aisles, since that seemed a bit too tedious and time consuming. I had estimated my cost via calculator with my list before arriving, and I knew it would be tight. So, I put all the non-essential items in the cart's basket to separate them from the "got to have" items like milk, meat, bread, recipe ingredients, etc. When I got to the checkout, I asked the cashier to give me a total after she rang up all the items on the conveyer belt, so I could see if I had enough money to put in the optional items at the end. I was fully prepared to have to put those items back and leave them at the store, if it came to that. It really wasn't too embarrassing. She didn't act like it was a big deal. I figured that they see people on food stamps every day who check out, so this can't be that strange. Luckily, I barely had enough for the "non-essential" items (like scrapbook adhesive, chocolate, facial toner, teething medicine, a few snack items etc).

2. Owen is now having to use his monthly allowence that he's been saving for some of his cub scout expenses and not just for toys. We previously would have absorbed all of those costs, but this month it just isn't possible. So, Owen chipped in and bought his own sleeping bag for his upcoming camping trip, and he also bought his own cub scout shirt, neck scarf, and tie for his uniform. He actually didn't complain at all about using his own money, and I was very proud of him!

3. Poor Stuart! He has been rolling all his change like crazy to come up with extra cash. He is going to Arizona for a week-long business trip and taking a couple of extra days to drive to the Grand Canyon to do some photography. He is rolling coins in order to come up with some extra spending money for the trip.

4. I needed a couple paperback novels for a professional development course that I am taking next week, so I went through my own books to see which ones I could part with. Then, I traded in several fiction books towards the cost of the new ones I needed. Plus, I did all this by going to a used bookstore instead of going through Barnes and Noble.

5. I have gone through all the cabinets and closets looking for items which we bought that were never taken out of the packaging or used. I found four such items (special art markers, media cord set, a metronome, and a flash drive). Then, I returned them to Walmart to use the money for food. I sold the metronome on Ebay for $30 since it was purchased at a music store, and we no longer had the receipt. It's taken some creative thinking to get extra cash!

6. I rescheduled my haircut appointment that was supposed to be next week because I won't have the cash to pay for it. I have even considered going to a really cheap salon instead of the $30 cut I usually get, but I'm not quite that desperate yet, and I don't want to spend three months growing out a really bad haircut. So, now I am waiting two more weeks to get my hair cut after Stuart gets paid again, and I can replenish my cash. I guess I'll just have about 7 days of "bad hair days" to live through!

It's been an eye-opening challenge, and I'm determined not to cheat on the "all cash" plan in the first month! Even though we have always had a budget, I am surprised about how much money we actually need for groceries and the bare essentials. I really underestimated some categories on paper.

I now have $48.37 to last for another ten days. It will be tough, but I'm sure I'll think of some other ways to make it stretch!

Smiles and Tears

Hudson had a large fall on Saturday that resulted in a goose-egg size knot on his forehead! He was apparently trying to jump from couch to couch (against house rules!) and fell headfirst on the edge of the wooden couch leg. Normally pretty tough, he cried quite a bit over this injury, and Stuart and I fretted over whether he had a "traumatic head injury." We spent several hours watching him and asking him things like, "How many fingers am I holding up?" and "Do you feel dizzy?" Luckily, it appears that he suffered no permanent damage and doesn't have a skull fracture!

Arden finally has enough hair for a little bow now! Isn't she cute! The boys can't get enough of her, but that might change once she gets mobile and figures out how to get into their stuff! She has had her own tears lately due to more teething . . . she is cutting her 7th and 8th teeth now. She appears to have little tolerance for pain and spends 7-10 days crying in the middle of the night every time we cut a tooth. Stuart says it's just the drama of being a girl!

A Stash of Cash

I never, ever used to carry cash. My reasoning was that I might lose it. My purse might get stolen. I might spend more if the money was readily available. It was too much trouble to get to the ATM. My handy debit card, credit card, and checkbook became the only way that I ever paid for anything, and our society made it very easy for that to work.

That would soon change.

Last week I took out several hundred dollars at the ATM. Cash. All mine. Okay, not really all mine. This cash had to pay for every Walmart purchase, all the groceries, the boys' haircuts, my Joico hair product at the salon, Owen's school lunches, Arden's prescription, stamps, and anything else that I needed for the next two weeks.

Suddenly, the stash of cash didn't look like it would last very long.

The reason behind this experiment that I've embarked on (and dragged Stuart into, as well!) is that I am trying to be more frugal and stretch our budget. With gas costs, food increases, and the costs of adding a third child, we are really stretching our budget pretty thin these days. I added up how much Arden has added to our monthly budget, and it is an extra $950 per month! Good thing I didn't know that when I was thinking of having baby #3, or I might have changed my mind! That includes her formula, baby food, baby cereal, a month's worth of diapers and wipes, monthly prescription, two days per week of childcare while I work, and the new car payment which came as a result of needing a car that would seat three kids in carseats. She costs more each month than our mortgage!

Anyway, each month I have been frustrated when I have a budget on paper, but it gets completely ruined when the credit card bill arrives. We never, ever carry a balance and have no credit card debt (thankfully), but the bill has gotten bigger and bigger each month and harder to pay. Afterwards, there was no money left for savings. I knew this had to change. We had to make the money we earned stretch further.

I would scrutinize the credit card bill, sure that there was a $500 error somehow that was causing the balance to be so high. Unfortunately, there weren't any big charges on it. Just pages and pages of small ones that added up to more than $500 over what I'd budgeted. Who knew that we charged things at Walmart over 10 times each month? The small charges of $4 and $5 for books, coffee, McDonalds, etc. ended up adding up to $258!

I recently saw an inspirational news clip on Yahoo about this family that decided to use cash completely for one month, as studies have shown that people spend 25-30% LESS when they have to pay with cash (opposite of my theory that I would spend more!). I looked up the Christian financial guru Dave Ramsey that Stuart had heard speak last year, and then I dusted off his book The Total Money Makeover that we'd never read . . . and I read it. In one day. Then, I ordered Dave Ramsey's super, duper "deluxe" envelope system wallet to organize my cash and record my expenditures (it just looked cool and made this whole frugal thing seem more stylish, and it was on sale 1/2 off!)

Luckily, we are ahead of most Americans since we have no credit card debit, but I was determined to have no unexpected, large credit card bill arrive in a one inch thick envelope every month. I've decided not to go 100% cash on everything, and I'm still paying for our set monthly bills electronically, and we are still using our credit card for gasoline at the pump (I can't imagine taking three young children into the gas station to pay cash every time I had to fill up!). However, all the areas where we typically overspend such as "miscellaneous," "food," or "household" expenses get paid with cash. When we run out, we run out. I'm trying to live more aware of how every dollar is spent, but I'm not at the extreme point where I'm making my own deodorant or granola!

I've actually gotten on http://allrecipes.com/ to search for ingredients that I had on hand to match with existing recipes, so we can eat the food already in our cabinets. Stuart and I rolled about ten rolls of quarters the other night. I returned a couple unused things at Walmart that were never opened, and I used the money for food. I bought my first large grocery shopping at Walmart this week and paid cash. I think they thought I was a drug dealer as I counted out my twenty dollar bills in a large pile!

I'm excited about the challenge. I think it is making me spend more consciously and not just slap down the credit card when the checking account gets low. Hopefully, next month there will be the reward of the nice, thin credit card envelope arriving in the mail . . . with only gas charges on it. Then, I'll feel like it's worth it!

A Legacy

I just started back to work teaching four sections of Composition I two weeks ago, and it just dawned on me today that I am beginning my 16th year of teaching.

Wow . . . when did I get so old?

I've been teaching since I was 23 years old. I have spent 2 years in a public junior high (now I know why those are the jobs they give the "new" teachers!), 8 years in a private preparatory high school, and I am beginning my 6th year as a college instructor. I've taught students who could hardly read above the 3rd grade level to ones who went on to Ivy League colleges; I've taught gang members during summer school with the Little Rock School District while a guard stood outside my door; I've taught pregnant teenagers; I've taught National Merit Scholars; I've taught college students who are old enough to be my parents.

It's been a wonderful, crazy, busy, and exciting ride!

Teaching has definitely been my calling and my passion. From the time I was little, I remember playing school and recycling old workbooks and making my siblings do them for "fun." I had dreamed of teaching college when I was in high school, only then to "settle" for a job as a high school teacher because there wasn't a way for me to pursue my doctorate degree after I got married and lived in Little Rock. It turned out to be the very best thing I ever did, as I found a great niche as a high school teacher, and I feel that I really got to make a difference during those years. Ironically, God has allowed that dream to come true in a different way than I ever imagined, as I currently teach at the college level and can work from home to be with my young children. I've had the best experiences being a teacher. It's never been like a job to me; it's been a part of who I am -- a product of my upbringing, a part of my innate need to connect with people and help them learn. As Stuart says, it's a way for me to use up the 10,000 words that I have to get out every day! Without it, I don't think I would feel as useful in the world. I am so grateful that I can still combine teaching with raising my children, and when they are ready, I will reenter the classroom as a full-time faculty member once again.

I started thinking about the students whom I've taught over the years, and the ones that I've seen as adults and where life has taken them. One of my former ninth grade students is a pharmacist now. He filled my prescription for me at Walgreens one night very late when I had a sick baby with an ear infection. He talked to me through the drive-thru lane with the sliding drawer and asked if I was the same "Mrs. Cearley" from Sheridan Junior High. It felt a bit strange to have to look up at him from my car while he gave me directions about the medication, and I smiled at the role reversal. He reminisced about how he loved my class and asked about my family. He seemed to have fond memories of my class, and I was proud to see that he had turned out so well.

Another student had a difficult and often explosive relationship with her mother. She took several classes with me, and it was always a challenge because the mother was often overinvolved. The student got pregnant during her first year in college. No one was surprised because I had heard several teachers say that she probably got pregnant just to have a way to escape her overbearing mother. She dropped out of college to marry the father, and now she lives near me. I run into her every few months at the soccer field, library, or a consignment sale. She's now been married for eight years, and she just had her fourth baby, but she said she still can't bring herself to call me by my first name; I'm still "Mrs. Cearley." She is such a great mom and shows genuine pleasure and interest in her kids. I visited with her husband at a library party this summer, and he really shows maturity for his young years. He's about to begin a term as a city councilman, and he is a very involved father. They are actively involved in a local church, and I am so proud of this student for turning her rocky start into a stable and loving home.

Another one of my favorite students was arrested last year for selling drugs. It was a widely televised arrest, and I saw his picture flash on the news repeatedly, and my heart broke for him. Initially, I was shocked. He had so much potential. What happened? I remember the talks we'd had, and how he had such severe ADHD that many teachers couldn't stand him being in their class. He liked English and was good at it, so his ADHD never bothered me. He had always seemed so naive and a bit immature, not at all like a person who would become a drug dealer in the next five years. I remember that he ate pencils and tore apart the plastic covers on 3-ring notebooks (literally) because he had such nervous energy. I routinely had to clean up the floor under his desk after he left class because of the debris he'd leave behind. But, he had such natural intelligence, good looks, and charisma. I remember thinking that he'd find his niche in college because high school was hard for him socially. I knew he didn't have a good relationship with his father, who was a very public personality in our community. On his final day of class with me, he sent me flowers. Now he is in jail.

Not all the stories with my students turn out well, but most do. I enjoy running into former students and seeing them grown. I read the Sunday social section to see if I recognize names of former students in high society listings or wedding announcements. Just last December, I was at the OBGYN office for one of my final checkups before I delivered Arden, and I heard an excited voice behind me say, "Mrs. Cearley?" I turned my huge belly in the direction of the voice, and came face to face with a former student who was also pregnant (with her 2nd child). She was probably 25. I was 37. Not to mention that she was as beautiful as a model and still looked trendy even when pregnant! We were both pregnant, but I was way too old for it! She laughed that we were pregnant together, and I enjoyed catching up with her. She is a great Christian mom who is staying home to raise her girls, and she reflected on my English class and all she enjoyed about it. She gave me the news on her classmates whom I also taught, and who is married, who is pregnant, etc.

When she was called out of the waiting room for her appointment, we hugged goodbye. I smiled as I watched her walk away. It felt really good. I felt like I had made a difference, and years later I hadn't been forgotten. Arden kicked inside my belly at the same time, and I laughed. I guess there are are a couple of ways that I'm leaving my legacy!